Extramarital Affairs and Divorce

Published: 27th July 2007
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Extramarital Affairs Have an Impact on Divorce?



Extramarital affairs have a great impact on divorce.



  • Divorce petitioned on this ground is affected by the time duration factor. The petitioner should seek a divorce within six months of discovering the affair. Undue delay indicates that the victimised spouse has accepted the affair.


  • Extramarital affairs either lead to a very quick divorce or create an extremely lengthy proceeding. If the marital spouse consents, divorce is almost instantaneous. But great delay occurs if the divorce gets contested and the petitioner names the co-respondent (the person with whom the affair took place.)


  • Extramarital affairs lead to a divorce in which mediation plays no role. The victimised spouse is often angry and amicable settlements are not possible in such a situation. The guilty spouse accepts all the terms and conditions. Acceptance is either due to feelings of guilt or the hurry to get remarried.


  • Divorce is granted immediately but the courts require plenty of supportive evidence of the affair.




Who is more likely to have an Affair - a Man or a Woman or Both?



Statistics claim that men commit adultery more. They outnumber women by 20%. However, no such distinction in numbers exists in extramarital affairs indulged in, by the younger generation.



Should Couples Seek Divorce due to Extramarital Affairs?



Is divorce an answer to extramarital affairs? This is a question that can be variedly answered. It depends on the reasons for which the wronged spouse is seeking a divorce. The very reasons for which the guilty spouse has committed the affair also determine the necessity of a divorce.



Reasons for Divorce



  • The reason for divorcing the offending partner should be clearly defined. If the innocent spouse is divorcing out of rage, then a second thought is necessary. Adulterous affairs do not last long. The spouse gone astray should be given a chance to rectify past mistakes.


  • If the decision to divorce is based on a desire to set the partner free, then a divorce is not necessary at all. Surveys prove that divorced people rarely marry their lovers. And if they do marry these marriages fail to last long. Probably, the guilt factor and the general mistrust in the institution of marriage play their role.




Reasons for the Affair



  • If a spouse has had an affair for the first time, it can be ignored. Habitual cheaters should be compulsorily divorced.


  • But survey results point out that people commit adultery not for the love of sex. Their extramarital affairs are a proclamation of the lack of intimacy in their marriage. It is this deprivation that leads them to seek intimacy outside marriage. Such couples should not divorce. Rather they should work at strengthening the marital bond.


  • Usually, people have an affair thinking that they love their spouse in spite of the affair. But this is a misconception. Such erring adults should be made to realise that if they loved their spouse they would not have committed adultery.


  • Some men also feel that their partners are no longer attractive.




Marital partners having affairs that transcend marital boundaries for the last two reasons mentioned above should be divorced. Such marriages have lost their sheen.



Does the Seriousness of the Affair Determine a Divorce?



Divorce is not an answer for extramarital affairs. But, by having an affair, the spouse has deprived the innocent party of the time and energy that are required to make a success of the marriage.



Men and women univocally expect their spouse to be emotionally dependable. Marriages last if these needs are met. Majority of the affairs are a result of unmet emotional needs.



Some people have come to believe that human race is not monogamous. This is a concept that cannot be morally justified. Extramarital affairs only occur when marriages lose their warmth. If couples make a sincere effort, marriages are bound to last long.







James Walsh is a freelance writer and copy editor. For more information on getting a Divorce see http://www.quickie-divorce.com




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